My Trip to ONEderland....

Sorry.

It's been a while...

I can always hear Billie's voice in my head telling me she loves me but I suck at blogging.

Well? Here I am. In what the Biggest Loser calls 'Onederland'.

After 20 years I broke through the 100 barrier and now see a 1 in front of what I weigh.

Ask me how it feels?

Uh...it feels scary...and unknown...and different than I thought it would. I'm not sure if I thought I would immediately love my body and feel the weight (pardon the pun) of not being 'over 200 pounds' just wash away. I was wrong. I feel the same. Actually I feel scared! Scared of going up over 200, scared of never being DONE....scared of being perpetually unhappy with myself...and scared of letting a number control my happiness. I mean, really, the difference between 200 and 199 is ONE pound...so why does it feel like a hundred pounds?

So, here's what I know for sure (Thank you Oprah). I know that God created me perfectly. I know that I am ENOUGH. I know that I will continue to make the right choices and hopefully, it will pay off, but while I'm stuck here (which I have been for weeks) I will be thankful for who I am. Really. Not what my body looks like, but what my actual heart and soul say about me. What the Creator of the universe says about me.

And He says, 'It is good'.

Just A Small Town Girl

Mostly I love living in a small town.

But here is a little story I call....'TOO SMALL TOWN'

I was in a certain drug store yesterday. The cosmetic lady ringing in my purchase used the F word. While I was at the till. Buying something expensive.

I don't know her. She just used it like we were at the bar. Which we weren't.

Please don't get me wrong, I'm not a prude, but is it super professional while ringing in someones purchase to utter this sentence 'Oh man, if that f*&%$(ng purfume didn't come in today I was going to have to stay home'.

Uh.....ok then.

Also, then today, at said drug mart (if you will) the pharmacist was waiting in line behind me, purchasing a monster energy drink when I heard him tell his buddy , 'Holy crap, I'm so hungover, man I wish I was still in bed'.

Please don't get a prescription today if you live in Smithers. It may not be safe.

Dear Mart....I get it, we have limited choices so I won't even call to complain about the severe lack of professionalism. Again, I'm no prude. Get drunk, it's not my problem but then maybe don't announce to people that could be sick and relying on you dispensing the correct pills to them, that you were SOOOOOOOOOOO wasted last night.

That's just me, and what do I know? I'm from Manitoba.

No News Is Good News

Ok.

I'm sorry Billie. I know I've been lacking in the blogging department but what is life is just life and I don't have anything interesting to write about?

What if no one really cares what I've been up to?

What if I'm happy things have been 'mundane' so I can enjoy life?

What if I'm loving having three girls who are amazing and wonderful and who I really really enjoy?

What if I'm doing the 100 day count down to Hawaii?

What if I'm not so afraid of 'winter' sports anymore, ie skating? What if I kind of rock ice skating now?

What if I'm all done my Christmas shopping so I have nothing to report there?

What if I tried spinning class and I don't love it but keep doing it because I love butter tarts?

What if I fell down the stairs this week at church infront of all the ladies I know?

What if I don't have anything good to say so that's why I don't blog?

Just Sayin'

Old Man Winter

I am originally from Manitoba. Yup...lemme hear it....'Winterpeg'....ahahahaha.....

I have lived in BC half of my life, but it's still not long enough to forget the BONE chilling, windy, Winnipeg winters.

I would even now consider myself a British Columbian.....but, there is one thing I can NOT stand for.....and that is whining about a BC winter.

I have a new friend, Janelle. She is from Ontario (don't judge her....she's lovely, and we can't hold the entire province's snobbery against her) and she has lived here in 'northern' BC (seriously, it's CENTRAL PEOPLE....LOOK AT A MAP!) for about 6 weeks. In those 6 weeks, all she had heard is how she is going to perish in the cold and awfulness of this winter....that she will not survive....that death would be welcome about January 5th.....

I. DO. NOT. GET. IT.

These winter complainers are obviously not from anywhere other than BC. Only in BC do people compare winter conditions with Vancouver. THE WARMEST MAJOR CITY IN CANADA IN THE WINTER.

We spend 95 % of winter days outside here! We snowmobile, we toboggan, we ski, we skate...and all in a relatively moderate winter climate! There is little or no wind here. It's about -10 all winter (with the exception of the two cold weeks that are in the -20's) and yes, the snow is here for about 3 or 4 months, but really people? Really? You want to compare yourselves to a city that collectively cries when it snows 5 cms? This is the true north strong and free for goodness sake! Man up!

Prairie people are hearty people. It's hotter than hades all summer and colder than....well, what's the opposite of hades?

Uh...that would be Winnpeg.

That Moment....

My BFF Heather recently posted a blog http://www.inallcyriousness.blogspot.com/ about her kids going off to the first full day of school. I re-read it a couple of times and thought back to that moment. The moment I brought my baby to kindergarten, then to full days of Grade 1.

I remember holding Delaney's hand and looking at ALL the kids around the playground and thinking, 'I can not just drop my child off here! There are so many kids! What if she gets lost? Or hurt? Or......' I also remember thinking that the grade 7's looked HUGE and mean. Also they dressed stupid.

Fast forward...and I mean FAST...to fall of 2011. I walked my baby girl to the school, where she was now the big, mean, stupidly dressed grade 7. She had painstakingly put on mascara (since years ago, she asked me when she could wear make-up to school and I said, 'UH...grade 7' in quite a hurry, thinking that was YEARS away. Well, she didn't forget, and she was very excited to get to wear make up to school) and picked out her clothes. She ruled the school. One. LAST. YEAR...until high school.

My Mommy heart soared and broke all at the same time. My Delaney Frances is a wonderful girl, inside and out, but she is not a little girl anymore. Calvin and I are doing what we are supposed to. We are teaching her that she can do ALL things through Him who strengthens her. We are reminding her to make good choices, even when we aren't around....and yet part of my heart breaks because time must move on....just in time for me to do this all over again next year with my sweet Avery Vanessa.

What Can I Say?

Ok, It's been two months. I was going to try and blog every two weeks. What happened?

Long summer days...sips of iced tea in tall glasses...freshly cut grass......

UH....NO.

Mostly just trying to rise above the crap weather we've had all summer and just get through until the sun shines.

Some life changing moments for me in the last two months...

1) I have a daughter who has ONE more year in elementary school, then she's off to high school. HUH?

2) We got a puppy. Dumb us. I know. The sheer amount of work is amazing when you have a puppy. I could just leave her to chew on random things in my house or wander all over but because I read a Cesar Millan book, I now have to be a pack leader. Arg.

3) All three of my girls went to kids camp in Terrace this year and left me home alone with the puppy. I was very sad. They weren't.

4) By the end of June, I had lost 40 pounds in 2011. If you read my new years resolves blog you'll notice that I have a number I want to get to. It's very close. I can feel it. I may be kicking the 200's in the ass very soon. Thank you Zumba and HCG.

5) We are ALMOST done our house reno's. June 2010 was a very traumatic month for me (house reno's...Dad dying). This June was better. Not great thanks to the weather and some 'Dad' issues I have...but not knock down, crawl under the sheets and cry all month bad.

6) I no longer have syrup in my Americano Misto from Starbucks. I know. It's for real people. Espresso, water and milk. Period.

7) It's official that I'm not a big fan of the province of Alberta. Even though I had an amazing holiday with my bff's, the drivers there drive me NUTS and photo radar is stupid. (**side note, I am also $87.00 poorer)

8) Our family is going on TWO big trips in the next 9 months. We are going to Cape Breton for Calvin's niece's wedding in October...and then in March we are going to Kauai for 16 days. I will find the sun somewhere. Somehow.

9) I have 22 piano students in the fall....busy lady.....thank the Lord I get 19 weeks of holidays a year. Phew. That working for a living is over rated!

10) I just bought the movie 'Dirty Dancing' for $4.99 on iTunes and it makes me so happy I could run outside in barefeet and dance in the rain. In July. For the gamillionith day in a row.

How's your summer?

Things I Have Learned On Oprah

I've been a stay at home mom/wife for almost 12 years...in those years I have watched ALOT of Oprah. I actually watched it before that too, but have rarely missed an afternoon in the last 12 years.

Now, don't go getting ideas about how I sat on the couch eating cookies while I snuggled under a blanket watching TV. Well, actually, go ahead...it was mostly that. Mostly because from 1-2 when my girls were small, they were sleeping so I had a couple hours to myself, and why clean when Dr. Oz may be on? These days, I usually watch it while I'm chopping veggies or folding laundry...but I ALWAYS watch it.

OK...this list is not exhaustive but this is what I've learned on Oprah....

• how to fold a fitted sheet so it looks FOLDED not rolled! (Martha Stewart was a guest that day!)


• what a mojito was...I had only heard the name but was to scared to ask what it was for fear I'd be outted as a some sort of cocktail knowledgeless loser.


• that poop should be 'S' shaped or 'C' shaped! (thank you Dr OZ)


• that you can wear brown and black together, although I'm still too scared to do this.


• that a properly fitted bra can make you look like you've lost 10 pounds. THIS IS TRUE! Hear me now ladies, a wrong bra size does nothing for you! Your boobs should not be resting on your belly. EVER. (**unless you are pregnant!!!**)


• That my overeating was never about the food, but about feeling 'less than' and stuffing my emotions with food.


• That people do care about one another. I've seen so many stories of horrific rapes, murders, incest, abuse...but also ones where people do good things for other people, just because it's the right thing to do.


• how the internet really works. (She did a show asking questions like, how does the picture get on your TV, and how does e-mail send from one virtual mailbox to another)


• That the US has a terrible education system. We in Canada should be thankful. (See...'Waiting for Superman' the documentary)


• how to sneak pureed veggies into baking without anyone knowing


• what my healthy weight was, and how it wasn't a number at all


• That people get SOOOOOOOOOOOOO crazy excited when they get free stuff, but I get excited too...even though I'm not there!


• That I may want to go to Australia...it had never appealed to me before but after seeing it on O, I think I'd like to go with the fam!


• that crying in the middle of the day is good for the soul


• that I'm very thankful for the husband I have (there are some DUDS out there)


• that I'm going to miss watching Miss O every day